Politics jokes
Did Walmart take the Juneteenth ice cream off the shelf?
It was only 3/5 full.
Difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?
Nothing, no one cares how much lead is in those kids.
If Joe Biden was on stage and he heard gunshots, he probably would’ve thought it was the ice cream truck.
Joe Biden would’ve died in the Secret Service tackle. They would have been like, "Get down Mr. Presi-"
Donald Trump took the bullet better than Joe Biden took the stairs.
Manly men go to strip clubs. JD Vance goes to IKEA.
If Kamala Harris is Indian, why doesn’t she have that dot on her head?
So she claims to be.
And the only black color I know is when you shut off the lights.
How did the Shaggy defense become successful for JD Vance?
He was not banging on the sofa. Rather, he was banging the sofa!
Why does JD Vance not need a conviction?
His running mate has 34 of them!
You gotta give it to JD Vance. He is consistent; he is Putin his dick where it don't belong!
Well, somebody has to cushion the blow.
Official flag of Great Britain? The Union Jack.
Official flag of Australia? The Southern Cross.
Official flag of Canada? The Maple Leaf.
Official flag of Japan? The Sun.
Official flag of Orange County, California? The Nazi Symbol.
What comment did the United States Senator Kamla Harris make when one of her 64% blue dog democrat constituents called her incompetent?
"Sometimes I sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits!"
What was the comment that Vice President Harris said in the United States Senate when a blue dog democrat in the United States Senate called Vice President Harris a bitch?
Kibbles 'N Bits!! Kibbles 'N Bits!! I is going to get me some Kibbles 'N Bits!!
Donald Trump secretly admires Joe Biden. How do I know?
He attempts to imitate "Sleepy Joe" by falling asleep during his court cases and during part of the Republican National Convention!
How can you tell Donald Trump is old and demented?
He can't distinguish between tanned people and cockroaches!
For all the talk of Donald Trump loving America, most of his lovers are imported from Eastern Europe.
If Donald Trump is running against Bill Clinton, it's safe to say that we are witnessing the Lolita Express Erections...oops, I mean Elections.
I'm shocked about Donald Trump escaping the transgender accusations. Trump is more talkative than any of the popular girls I went to school with! Not to mention Trump's tweets...
What's the difference between your mom in bed and Biden in the presidential race?
Your mom finishes.
It's no surprise Donald Trump moved to Florida. That's where the oranges are.