Plane jokes
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa, not screaming in terror like all the passengers on the plane he was flying.
A plane is going to crash. There are four passengers and only three parachutes. All the staff are safe and are gone, leaving the passengers. Ryan Reynolds is the first. He says, "My fans need me," and jumps. Donald Trump takes another and says, "I am the smartest president," and jumps, leaving one. There is a pope and a boy left. The pope says, "Child, my life is over and yours has just begun, take the last parachute." The boy replies, "Don't worry - Donald took my backpack."
Are you a plane? Because I wanna be in control of you for a few hours.
What’s the difference between McDonald’s and 9/11?
One is a drive through; the other is a fly through.
Why didn't R. Kelly go to Germany to fuck teens? The legal age there is 14...Like bro hop on a plane and fuck a 14 year old hooker!
What did one twin tower say to the other? "Be back, I gotta catch a plane."
This is a 2 for 1 plane combo that will never exist.
But, it's like a plane pizza.
Nothing happens, but it terrorizes me.
Why can't we see or sense kamikazes' bombs?
They're out of plane sight.
Did I ever tell you my father should have been on the plane that crashed into the Twin Towers?
But that's just my opinion.
I tried dressing up as the plane that crashed into the Twin Towers for the office costume party.
It didn't land too well.
You know why you never wanna fly with an orphan?
'Cause then they know they won't die alone.
Dr. Seuss died September 24, but that was a lie. Dr. Seuss, when he was 97, he stole a plane and the last rhyme he did was “up in the sky so very far he comes, Dr. Seuss allahuakbar.”
9/11 jokes aren't funny. They are just plane wrong.
On the day of 9/11, the WTC's ordered cheese and pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.
Yo mama so stupid, she thought Kobe Bryant survived the plane crash.
What were the terrorists on 9/11 thinking?
"We can't go over it." "Can't go under it." "We have to go through it!"
"Twins sitting in class."
Me: Casually throws a paper plane at them.
That forehead is so tall it can eat a plane! Open wide!
You know, people should really stop making fun of 911....both my parents died.
One driving one plane, and the other driving the other.
A collection of 911 jokes.
What kinda pizza did they order at 911?
Plane.
What was the color of 911?
Plane.
What is the fastest way to see 911?
Plane.