Physics jokes
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Steven.
Can't you read? It says, "No Hawking."
What was Stephen Hawking's last meal?
His left shoulder.
Yo mama so fat that when she sits on the beach, she sinks!
Zaine Davis and Stephen Hawking fuck each others brains out.
Stephen Hawking: one hp (Fortnite)
What’s the difference between a doctor and a pedophile?
The doctor doesn’t enjoy giving physicals.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite snack?
Vegetables.
A guy is at home and he's about to go get a physical at the doctor's office. When he gets there, the doctor says, "Brian, you're going to have to stop masturbating." He asked the doc why? The doc said, "So I can examine you!"
Why is it that a physically disabled gay white male will refuse to ask his boss that is an abled bodied gay white male for an increase in his paycheck?
Since he has a very big white dick in his mouth, that could be the reason why.
What has two wheels and goes really fast?
A vegetable down a hill.
How do you execute Stephen Hawking?
The electric wheelchair.
Stephen Hawking said there is no god.
God said there is no Stephen Hawking.
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because it was a very large mammal; its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to Heaven, I will ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to Hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."
I like balls.
Why couldn't Stephen Hawking go to Heaven?
Because there were stairs.
What happened to Stephen Hawking after he reached Heaven? Nothing yet. He is still struggling to get up the stairway to Heaven.
The one thing I love about Steven is he stood up for all of his haters. Just kidding!
Funny how "Hawking" rhymes with "talking" and "walking," and he can't do either.
And the first four letters of his Christian name spell "step," and he also can't do that.
Why didn’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
He couldn’t climb the stairway.
The nearest approximation to a perpetuum mobile would be a Swabian chasing a Scot because of money.
(Swabians are the Scots of Germany regarding finances.)