Personal

Personal jokes

Site

  • Don't go to ghostposter.com. The person or persons who run that site are a fucking bunch if dumb fucking cunts who can suck my big cock.

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    Relationship

  • The only problem being short and gay is that whenever I try to tell people I'm top in my relationship, they don't believe me because I'm shorter than the person I'm dating, like, WTF?

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    Stripper

  • Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord?

    A: It's cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you're pretty much screwed.

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  • Duck

  • A guy saw a person with a duck and said, "Where did you get a pig?"

    The owner replied, "It's not a pig, dummy!"

    The random guy said, "I wasn't talking to you, I was talking to the duck."

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    Noose

  • Snow everywhere, it's Christmas time. A person looks at the tree.

    The person: "Only the last thing left to hang!"

    He grabs a noose.

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    Planet

  • Gay person to girl: What’s your favorite planet?

    Girl: Penus-(penis)(venus), and what is yours?

    Gay person: What else, it's Your Anus (Uranus)!😅

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  • Pterodactyl

  • Literally no one: Why can't you hear the pterodactyl?

    Random person: I don't know.

    No one: BECAUSE THEY ARE EXTINCT!

    Random person: Ha, cool, I guess.

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    People

  • 9 people walked into Bunnings Warehouse.

    2 people bought plants.

    3 people bought shovels.

    1 person yelled.

    3 people left Bunnings Warehouse.

    1 person was me. I guess those three people are fired! 💁‍♀️🤦‍♀️

    Blender

  • Person 1: Why did you put the baby feet first into the blender?

    Person 2: To see his facial expression. Why else?

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    Skeleton

  • A funny joke scenario.

    Person 1: Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?

    Person 2: Because he had no "body" to go with.

    Person 1: Because he was ugly, fat, and nobody liked him.

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