Person jokes
People were talking and asking what's the worst day of the year for them.
Person 1: "The first day of school because I don't like going to school."
Person 2: "Valentine's day because it's too lovey."
Me: "Oh nice, mine is my birthday because it's when I was born."
What would you call a person who hides in a house for 24 hours and then kills them?
Morgz.
What do you call a person?
A person.
Me, an orphan: *laughing at orphan jokes*
Some person: Stop laughing, it's sad to laugh at your pain.
Me, an orphan: That's the funny part, what am I going to do, tell my parents?
Why can't a homeless person win a baseball game?
They can't find home plate.
What did the female farmer say to the person who raises a male chicken? "Nice cock!"
As a son, I am so worried about the phone call message that my mom got from a member of The CDC. It was on speaker, so me and mom both hear. The message told my mom that she needs to personally isolate because two of the new symptoms is having big titties and a great personality.
If you are dehydrated, you should get well soon.
I put someone in a wheelchair into the fire and called him "hot wheels."
like if you know someone that is emo.
When a person in a wheelchair says, "You've never taken a step in my shoes," and you say, "To be honest, you haven't either."
Don't make a person look a fool when you are the real one!
Ever noticed that "lol" looks like a person drowning?
How do you verify a rape claim? You make it true, and then the person is a victim for sure.
Stephen Hawking died because his WiFi ran out.
How do you tell if someone is depressed?
The brains on the wall.
What do you call a deaf and blind axe murderer?
Helen Killer.
How do you keep a blind person entertained? Give them a piece of sandpaper and tell them it’s a word.
Hey, you down to fuck?
No, I’m just down.
You're so fat, when someone calls you fat, you get depressed and cut you a slice of cake.