Person jokes
There are two types of faces:
The handsome one, but the wallet is ugly.
Then there is this personal face full of bumps, but even they lack a wallet.
I robbed a person in a wheelchair. He cried and said: "You can run, but you can't hide." I ran, and I never saw him again.
If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I'd be broke.
What do cannibals call a person that is running?
Fast food.
They are hairy.
This anorexic girl wanted to fight me. I told her that I would roast her, but she didn't have any meat.
When a person yells, just laugh and remember that they can’t hurt what’s already dead.
What do you say after making fun of a disabled person?
"Sorry, I didn't mean to step on your toes."
How do you know someone is going to die?
He can't stop coughing. (coffin)
Why does everyone respect midgets and dwarves?
They never look down on anyone.
What do a deaf person and an orphan have in common? Neither of them can hear their parents.
What is the difference between a suicidal person and you? You're not dead.
Comment on this if you are somewhat like me: depressed, single, gay, and act like you're not burning inside.
Why did the nose cross the road to find the person who "nose"?
Let's say I was immortal. No matter what I did, I would be alive. But, the catch is I’m the least flexible and least strong person in the world.
Now, I get my head chopped off. What would I do? I would roll over to my headless body and figure out what it's like to suck my own dick.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Die.
Die who?
Me, I want to die.
Normal person: "I'm perfect!"
Goth person: "Nobody is."
You know, being a bitch is hard... but I found the person who's up for the challenge... you.
Q: What did the person who invented the door knocker get?
A: A no-bell prize.
What’s Stephen Hawking’s favorite food?
His shoulder.