Person jokes
Let's say I was immortal. No matter what I did, I would be alive. But, the catch is I’m the least flexible and least strong person in the world.
Now, I get my head chopped off. What would I do? I would roll over to my headless body and figure out what it's like to suck my own dick.
Normal person: "I'm perfect!"
Goth person: "Nobody is."
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Die.
Die who?
Me, I want to die.
You know, being a bitch is hard... but I found the person who's up for the challenge... you.
Ever absorb Griffin?
Brady Quinn!!
Memes
There are two types of faces:
The handsome one, but the wallet is ugly.
Then there is this personal face full of bumps, but even they lack a wallet.
Q: What did the person who invented the door knocker get?
A: A no-bell prize.
Both man and woman have balls, but they like to play with the ball of each other because a person always loves what they don't have. 😁
Why did the nose cross the road to find the person who "nose"?
Person: You suck!
Me: Tell that to your mom, and she’ll say the same thing, honey. 😎
What’s Stephen Hawking’s favorite food?
His shoulder.
A blonde accidentally kills a cop and calls the police.
She exclaims, “Hello, is this 911?”
The other person, “Yes, what is your emergency?”
The blonde answered, “I called to inform you that you’re 910 now.”
Friend: Name one gay person off the top of your head.
Me: Me.
What can’t a Black person say to a police officer?
"Thanks for the warning."
Feeling stressed? Have a nice cup of tea and spill it in the lab of the person bothering you.
What do you call a white person from Africa?
Albino.
How do you find a black person in the dark without a flashlight?
Tell them a joke to make them smile.
What do sharks and people have in common? The great ones are white.
Imagine if you were an Arabic person shopping at Walmart with your son.
Now imagine he got lost and you had to start calling out his name.
...Now imagine his name is "Allahu Akbar."
Person 1: "I love KFC."
Person 2: "Yeah, me too!"
Person 1: "How many have you gotten?"
Person 2: "How am I supposed to remember how many buckets of chicken I have ordered!?"
Person 1: "Chicken? What chicken? What do you think KFC stands for?"
Person 2: "Kentucky Fried Chicken?"
Person 1: "What? I thought it meant kidnapping foster children."
Person 2: "BLOODY WHATT??"