Person jokes

What does an orphan have that a homeless person doesn’t?

A home, but what does a homeless person have that orphans don’t?

A parent.

"How would you describe yourself in three words?"

"Lazy!"

You're so skinny, you use chapstick as deodorant.

Louie Fennell.

If a midget walks up to you and tells you your hair smells nice, is that sexual harassment?

What is a Mexican person's favorite sport?

Cross country.

I sometimes want rampage, but what good would that do?

I look for a way out, but there's not even a light shining through.

The times where all is dark, are the times that I need a mark.

Though people say that nobody will care, the truth is: there's always one who's fair.

That person may not be the one you expect, but I am here with a passion to redirect.

Once there was a time where I tried to end it all, because I only looked on the dark side.

Truth was I wanted to be heard, to be respected, to let someone know.

But that was in the past and this isn't about my dark ride, it's time for others to know that only a few words, can extinguish a glow.

Me sees crazy man hit a old poor person. Me dials 911.

Police: What is that location?

Me: I don't know where is dis location.

Police: Mission failed, we will try again later.

Me: WTH?

Police: Ends call.

Me: Calls hospital.

Hospital: What is that location?

Me: I don't know where is dis location.

Hospital: Mission failed, we will try again later.

Me: WTH IS HAPPENDS EVERY TIME NOW EVERYTHING IS ON FIRE.

Hospital: Hangs up.

Me: Calls fire dEpArTmEnT.

Fire: No fire.

Fire dEpArTmEnT: What is that location?

Me: Hangs up and give up and goes home.

I find this website. I see this person named Gwen. I simp for her, but just for a troll. Next thing I know, we're somehow dating? Then her ex comes in and dates her again. Apparently, he is gay, and I'm pretty sure Gwen could be a boy, but he or she has 3 friends who always back her up, just to let y'all know this isn't really supposed to be a dating app or drama app, it's a joke app, and this isn't really a joke. But one last thing, you guys are all b*tches...

A rapist walks into a school and asks if they had 5 year olds in the school, and the teacher replies, "Are you that same person who took Jimmy?"

The man replies, "Yes," and the teacher says, "Take Susie too; she's being a little bitch."

What do you call a deaf person?

Whatever you want!

What’s the difference between an erection and Edward Holland? Nothing, they're both dicks.

What do you call a non-binary person that is lactose intolerant?

Non-buy dairy.

Me.

At least someone who is gay/Carter has someone.

Person: "Doctor, doctor, I've only got 50 seconds to live!"

Doctor: "Just give me a minute!"

What do you call a smart person in America?

A tourist.

A blind person walks into a bar.

Because they can’t see where they are going.

Gvido gubis.

You know, being a bitch is hard... but I found the person who's up for the challenge... you.