Person jokes
What do you call a rich Chinese person?!? Kaching!
A person asks a taxidermist what they do for a living. The taxidermist replies, "Oh, you know, stuff."
What do you call a person who cares for chickens?
A chicken tender.
Helen Keller is the kind of person to ask you what the time is.
I'm a gay depressed person. Would that make me a happy unhappy person?
Memes
What does a depressed person and a jacket have in common?
They’re both hanging in the closet.
The last words of a depressive person are: "Yay, Freedom."
Why does no one die a virgin? Cause life fucks us all.
I told the last person I slept with I was pregnant. He freaked the fuck out but calmed down after he realized it was April Fools'.
The look on my cousin's face was hilarious.
What do you call getting gonorrhea from a disabled person?
A slow clap.
How do you piss off a disabled person?
You put the cookie on the other shoulder.
They can't say no if they're unconscious.
Why was Timmy the only happy person in his family?
Timmy is dead.
Mary's mother was a good person. Why did she die?
Because she got stabbed in the heart 60 times by a switchblade.
What is a self-harm person's favorite game?
Fruit Ninja.
I went to the dam to take the dam tour, but the dam tour guide told me there wasn't going to be a dam tour that day. So I was thirsty and I wanted some dam water, but the dam man wouldn't give me any dam water, so I told the dam man to keep his dam water.
How can you save a depressed person from a tree?
You cut the rope.
What do you call a disabled person in a sauna?
Steamed veggies!
What do you call a Black person going down a waterslide? Sewage.
What would be a good job for a fat person? A four-chin teller!