Person jokes
The FBI said, "Open up!" I shout to them.
A person said, "Cookie sale." I opened up. He fucked me.
A Japanese person comes to America and sees guns everywhere. One American says, "Welcome to America!"
In the cute fantasies: "Est-ce que tu manges du poulet? Attendez une seconde, VOTRE PROFESSEUR VEGAN!!!!!"
In reality: "Are you eating chicken? Wait a second, YOUR THE VEGAN TEACHER!!!"
You will never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace.
I was trying to make friends, and this one person came up to me. They said, "Lettuce be friends?" I just laughed and said that was tear-able.
Person: Did you hear about the black chick on the front of the bus?
Friend: No?
Person: Exactly.
When you're at a funeral and you laugh at the body... everyone stares, and one person said, "Isn't that your mom...?"
Why does everyone get offended at female firefighters?
Like seriously, if your house is on fire and burning, you wouldn't really care if the person saving you had a low IQ, right?
I'm such a good babysitter because the last person I babysat was so flat.
When someone calls me ugly, I get sad and hug them.
I know life can be difficult for those with weak vision.
"The rise of atheism is going to lead to a break down of social morals and lead to all kinds of filth, including an increase in child abuse," said the village priest.
The village scientists did some fact checking. In prison, they found roughly 70% of child abusers were hyper religious before committing the crimes, and another 20% converted to religions to look 'remorseful'. The remaining 10% preferred not to say. They presented the findings to the media.
"Scientists slander good religious folk and ignore the weight of evidence!"
"Is Science biased against religion? You decide in this survey," they reported.
The village priest is living at his majesty's convenience and tells the others he committed armed robbery.
"Why is this a joke? It's not even funny!" said the person reading this, breaking the forth wall.
What is funny is you got to the end of this post and didn't cringe. Why not?
Why are you so tired if you can’t see? Because you are blind.
Why did the emo person cross the road?
TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE Haha.
What does the depressed person say to the happy person?
"Damn, I wish I was on the stuff you're on, lol."
Evan David Sandri is gay and he is adopted.
I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.
What do you call a talentless Korean person? Us Lee Less!
*Breaking News!* - Apparently the first person in Melbourne has died because of the Coronavirus. In his house they found 1000 cans of food, 50 kilos of pasta, 80 kilos of rice, 300 toilet rolls and 50L of hand sanitiser which he had panic purchased from the supermarket and stockpiled "just in case".
The whole lot collapsed and buried him.
Why shouldn't you let a Chinese person play baseball?
'Cause they'll eat the bat!
His name is Donald, but he looks like Goofy.