Person jokes
What do you call a person with a flip flop?
My dad.
How do you know when a fat person stops eating? You read about it in the obituary.
One time a blind person grabbed my arm thinking it was something else.
"Oh wow, this is such an interesting book!"
What’s the difference between my ex and a unicycle?
A unicycle can only take one person at a time.
What do you call a deaf and blind axe murderer?
Helen Killer.
A conman, a mentally handicapped person, and a Russian spy walk into a bar.
And the bartender asks, "What will it be, Mr. President?"
What’s the difference between a Black person and snow tires?
Snow tires still work after you take the chains off.
His name is Donald, but he looks like Goofy.
Fat person: "Hey, what's up?"
Friend: "Your blood pressure!"
Yo mama so fat, when she made a joke, only one person laughed at it: the pavement. It was absolutely cracking up!
How did the fat person cross the road?
It rolled.
What does a depressed person and a chicken have in common? They both try to fly.
What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat.
Yo man, stand up.
*short person stands*
No, seriously man, stand up!
It's not surprising there isn't a whole lot of good tree jokes.
Most foresters have a wooden personality.
Gun control in America is perfect the way it is, because the other day my daughter was seeing a boy and i caught them in bed. Then i pulled out my shotgun and nearly shot him. As he was running away I shouted " The only person allowed to f*ck my daughter is me!".
What do you call a person with Down syndrome who graduated high school?
Impossible!
Q: What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in front of a door?
A: Mat.
A dyslexic walks into a bra.
What do you call a person with no body and no nose? "Nobody knows."