Person jokes
What kind of bath bomb does an emo person use?
A toaster.
Why can't a homeless person win a baseball game?
They can't find home plate.
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
What did John say after someone shot his leg?
Oof!
I'm what they call a ✨️askhole✨️.
A person who will consistently ask for your advice and wisdom, but then proceed to do the exact opposite of what you say.
Regular depressed person: I'm depressed, so I'll go see a therapist.
Me: I'm depressed, so I won't do anything about it, work on many projects at the same time, destroying my sanity slowly while relying on caffeine and pills as my only way to take down my headaches, and making memes about it online to help myself cope with the pain.
what do you call an emo person who's not depressed?
dead.
What is the difference between a human and a magic house!?
A magic house 🏡 can fly, and a human can walk.
What do you call an orphan?
A bootysnagger45.
What do you call a dwarf with autism? Matthew Michal?
How does the next train stop for a depressive person? Death.
Why did the suicidal person cross the road? He was waiting for a car.
Yoav
What does the long distance call and a Black person have in common?
They both don’t work.
Q. What movie is a fat person most afraid of?
A. The Hunger Games.
What's the difference between a retard and a normal person?
A normal person is not named Josh Wakling.
I got mad at my white friend today. I, as a darker person, had told them to meet me outside at 3 o'clock. They, being VERY special that day, had said, "AM or PM?"
Laughing at their question, I said, "Honey, 3 AM, because I'll lose a fight at 3 PM."
Me: *listening to music under a tree and smiling*
Random person who sees me: Awwww look at him, he looks so so happy ^w^
Me: *actually listening to depressing music that makes me wanna kill and end myself but just smiles to show that everything's gonna be fine even if it won't*
Asians love it when a British person says "Rice!"
What is meals on wheels to a Christian nationalist that is also a conservative Republican politician, a gay man in a wheelchair that is poor and also physically handicapped, and who is also well-endowed?