People jokes
Why are hill billies so weird? Because their name is Billy.
How do Asian people name their children?
They throw a pan down the stairs.
What would your name be? Msg it to @chelsearosegraham.
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
I named my dog 5-Miles, so now I tell people, "I walk 5-Miles every day."
Cancer is like a video game.
Some people cannot beat it.
A man had moved to a new country with his dog and with basic understanding of the language. One day he heard people talking about a place for dogs, so he took his dog there, telling them he wanted his dog to be groomed.
The man behind the counter responded with "yes happy dog, come back in little hours." So the man left and came back a couple hours later. When he asked about his dog, he was given a box of jerky. He found out "Happy Dog" was the name of the place where dogs become food.
You can say what you want about deaf people...
I knew the human race made mistakes, but you're the worst I've seen so far...
People joke about 9/11, but it's not funny. My dad died in 9/11. Best pilot in Saudi Arabia.
Why can't gay people play Baseball? They can't throw the ball straight.
I like my women like I like my coffee.
Without other people's dicks in it.
I just came up with a really good deaf people joke! The great thing is that they won't be able to hear it!
What did a comedian say at a show full of blind people?
"What's up?"
The greatest doctor, smartest man, young geek, and inspiring preacher are on a plane. The pilot dies of a heart attack and is confirmed by the doctor. But, there are only 3 parachutes on the plane. The doctor takes one and says,
"People need me for my excellent medicine!" and jumps out. The smart man grabs one and shouts,
"People are in need of my great knowledge!" and jumps out. There is only one more parachute on the plane. The preacher says to the geek,
"You are too young. Take the final parachute and go." The geek instead says,
"No, there are two parachutes left, the 'smart' one took my backpack."
They told me I could never be an actor.
No one suspected me when they went missing the next day.
How did two retarded people get ran over in one second?
They're my friends.
What do you call a butt that kills people?
An ASSassin :)
Joke 1) 9/11 was such a tragedy... Two drunk people drove a plane into a building.
Joke 2) If 6-2=4, why are there no more towers?
Joke 3) Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Whatever it is, it’s heading straight for the World Trade Center.
The last joke about the dad was a joke. Don't take it seriously. Can't believe that people actually think that was true.
Chemistry joke: Why did the Superman being normal people when a krypton was at him?
Because krypton is "stable."