People

People jokes

One apple a day keeps the doctor away; not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.

I have fun going on them roller coasters that go really high up and sitting by random people, and once we get to the high point, I look at the stranger and go "wham" and unplug their seat belt.

So there was a school shooting in Florida. Why didn't the shooter just go to Disney?.......sorry, I just work there and I'm trying to get people to come on down.

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  • You know every time we think of sex, an angel dies.

    We ran out of dead people hundreds of years ago.

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  • Why can't two Chinese people have a white baby? Because "two wongs don't make a white."

    Some people ask why jokes exist. I say, when a mommy and daddy love each other very much, they have sex, and they make another one of you.

    Someone told me that you can let out all your anger by writing letters about everyone you hate and then burning them... But I was just wondering... should I keep the letters?

    What do you call a group of ethnically diverse disabled people?

    Seasoned vegetables.

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  • This is mean af. Y'all need to stop this. Like, what the f *ck? What would happen if you all grew up and you were like this? Like, damn.

    A husband and a wife have four children. The oldest three are tall with blonde hair. The youngest is short with brown hair. The husband was on his deathbed and said, "Honey, can you be completely honest with me? Is our youngest son mine?" The wife says, "I swear to all that is holy, he is your son." Then the husband died and the wife muttered, "Thank god he didn't ask about the other three."

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