Pedophile

Pedophile jokes

What are the differences between a preschool and a pedophile's basement? Little kids leave preschool.

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  • My girlfriend is 19 and I'm 29. We go out to eat in a restaurant, but the whole time I have to deal with being accused of being a pedo, being called disgusting and disturbed.

    It completely ruined our 10 year anniversary.

    What's the difference between a PC and a 6 year old? I don't have to clean out my PC.

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  • What is a pedophile's favorite song?

    Jerking off in A minor.

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  • What’s the relationship between a pedophile and a light bulb? They're both meant for dark rooms.

    Ten Catholic priests all die in a bus accident. When they arrive at the pearly gates, St. Peter acknowledges them. He sees that they're all priests and immediately says "If any of you are pedophiles, there's no point waiting here. You might as well eff off straight to hell right now!” Nine of the priests turn around and begin to walk away. St. Peter calls after them, "AND TAKE THE DEAF BASTARD WITH YOU TOO!”

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  • What's the hardest thing about being a pedophile?

    Just trying to fit in.

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  • Why did the child cross the road?

    To get to the church.

    Knock, knock.

    Who's there?

    The Priest... Let's go to my office, because I'm totally not a pedophile.

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  • what did the pedophile say to the kid?

    "Roses are red, my name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van."

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