Parent jokes
Why do orphans hate mitosis cells?
They have parents.
In 2001, my parents took me to 9/11. I was soaring towards it with excitement!
My parents told me that I should go hang with my friends and get out of the house.
So I called some of my friends and told them to meet me in the school yard. One said, "What tree?"
I replied, "You’ll know when you get here!"
My parents never said how they wanted us to hangout.
Why are kids so skinny?
Parents eat all the food themselves, and let the kids starve.
My daughter has been writing letters asking Satan for gifts. Imagine my shock when I realized she has dyslexia.
Memes
imagine having a dad
I love when I could run through the grass and feel the wind on my face.
Then my mom told me to get off VR, and then I wheeled myself to her.
I pushed an orphan and they said, "I'm telling!" I asked, "Telling who? Your parents?"
I'm 17, right? Anyways, the other day my parents told me a joke they made 17 years ago, but they still haven't told the joke yet.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your parents.
Why do orphans like stealing things?
They wanted to have company.
How do Asian parents name their baby?
They drop a pot down a flight of stairs.
My parents found my YT channel. I hate myself now, and I'm emotional.
SELF HARM
I asked the orphan kid if his mom is hot. He just started crying.
Your hairline and your eyebrows are like your parents, separated.
How do you know if an Asian is a failure?
Figure it out, because they'll all tell you their parents said they were a failure from birth.
Why was the orphan stupid?
Because his parents couldn't guide him.
Me: Hi Jacob!
Jacob: Hi.
Me: Your parents went to jail for littering when you were born!
Jacob: GOO GOO GAH GAH
Q: Why was the 4 year old anti-vaxer crying?
A: He was in a mid-life crisis.
What do you call a parent that is pregnant?
Buy one, get one free.
Why did the orphan sit alone in the corner?
They wanted some family time.