Parent jokes
Why do kids like to pick on orphans?
Because they can't call their parents.
I went to visit my childhood home. I asked the owners if I could come in for some nostalgic memories. They said no and slammed the door on me. My parents are so mean.
Me calling the orphan kid from school: "Hello, are your parents home?"
The orphan kid: *starts sobbing* "STOP CALLING HERE!"
What do you call it when an orphan goes to Panera Bread?
"Panera, my parents are dead."
Parent: My parents never attended my birthdays.
Birthday girl: Oh wow!
Parent: Anyone missing?
Birthday girl: Your parents.
Memes
What does Buzz Lightyear and an orphan's parents have in common?
They go to infinity and beyond.
What is cold and alone?
An orphan's parent.
What does an orphan call a family portrait?
A selfie.
Why couldn’t the kid play baseball? Because he couldn’t find home.
Yesterday I was asked where my parents are. I said, "Getting milk."
Orphans: Where are my parents?
Random person: In the bed.
What's the one upside to being an orphan?
You never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.
I asked the orphan why he was crying. He didn't really say anything.
Then I asked where are your parents? He cried more. I love working at the orphanage.
Why do orphans hate mitosis cells?
They have parents.
Why can't orphans play video games?
Because they don't have their parent's email.
What did the mom say when her child came out?
"The head was so big!"
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas. I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To find their parents.
On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"
The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."
The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"
The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."
My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.