What's the one upside to being an orphan?
You never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.
Parent Jokes
On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"
The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."
The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"
The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To find their parents.
Yesterday I was asked where my parents are. I said, "Getting milk."
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas. I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
Orphans: Where are my parents?
Random person: In the bed.
I asked the orphan why he was crying. He didn't really say anything.
Then I asked where are your parents? He cried more. I love working at the orphanage.
Why can't orphans play video games?
Because they don't have their parent's email.
What did the mom say when her child came out?
"The head was so big!"
Why do orphans hate mitosis cells?
They have parents.
My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.
When your parents say, "We are sorry that you are here," what do you think of that?
I think that you're an accident!
Mom: I was an orphan once. The kid: Oh, ok, idgaf. Mom: And you're gonna be too! :) The kid: Ok, idgaf- WAIT WHAT THE FU-
In 2001, my parents took me to 9/11. I was soaring towards it with excitement!
What song do supportive parents of a closeted child love?
“The Son Will Come Out Tomorrow.”
Kid: What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher: What?
Kid: Fruity Pebbles with water.
Teacher: Why water?
Kid: 'Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
My daughter has been writing letters asking Satan for gifts. Imagine my shock when I realized she has dyslexia.
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
How do you know if an Asian is a failure?
Figure it out, because they'll all tell you their parents said they were a failure from birth.
What do you call a parent that is pregnant?
Buy one, get one free.
