Original jokes
I am crying tears of joy rn.😭 I was wrongfully denied my visa. ☠️ They took me to the Q&A section, that I needed to answer one simple question for my visa to be granted.
The question was the original synonym of Bench. I shakily answered "Pristiano Penaldo" 😭. I was right guys ✅🛫
If you eat her out on her period, does that make you Cunt Dracula?
A girl's pussy is a muff, and when we have something against our mouths, they say our voice is muffled, so do I think the origin of the word "muffled" is talking while eating muff?
Johnny: Why do cuss words exist?
Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older.
|| 20 YEARS LATER ||
Johnny: Mom, now can you tell me why cuss words exist?
Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them.
Johnny: Damn, Mom, you shoulda told me that when I was still seven 'cause now I really feel like that person.
When someone said to an orphan, "My boyfriend ghosted me," the orphan says back, "Don't worry, my parents ghosted me!" 🤣
Does chocolate milk come from black cows?
Jesus was the one who created the T pose, not Fortnite.
When a rocketship went into space, seven astronauts went into space. That's why it's called NASA.
Whoever invented religions, they fucked up.
We got all kinds of retarded adults believing in mythologies.
A joke becomes a dad joke when it leaves for milk and never comes back.
Fun fact: Pringles are named Pringles because somebody decided to name them Pringles.
What is the origin of the glory hole?
The origins can be found in San Francisco, California, where historians claim that a meat thermometer was sticking out of a hole from both sides, especially the divider between bathroom stalls inside the men's restroom used for an anonymous massage for gay men by gay men in San Francisco, CA, in the Wild West.
Why is basketball called basketball?
Because you play with a basket.
How do Chinese people get their names? Their parents throw woks down the stairs and name their children after the sound it makes.
Why did they call it "Aqua Claudia"?
Because it carried water, and another word for water is aqua. Duh!
Where does an orphan come from?
Daddy getting milk.
Where do otters come from? Otter space.
A girl asked her mom, "Why is my name Walmart?"
Her dad replied and said, "Because that’s where you were made."
One day, there were three people: a mom and two kids. One of the kids walks up and asks her mom why she was named Rose. Her mom told her that she ate a rose petal when she was born; that is why she was named Rose.
Then the second child walked up and yelled, "Ahhhhhh!" and the mom said, "Shut up, Billy Goat!"
Why did the Asian parents have an Asian baby?
Two wongs don't make a white.