Why can’t an orphan play baseball or softball
They can’t find home 🤣
why dose Michael Jackson have such a hard time playing chess? he cant choose between black or white.
My Aunt visited and saw all of the stuff around the house my mom had kept over the years and said "If you have something that no one likes, and it only makes people upset, or its useless, throw it away." the next time my Aunt visited she said "Where is you daughter?" my Mom said "I took your advice"
Don't tell a Titanic joke, or you'll sink to a whole new low.
A guy wins a free ticket to the Super Bowl and so he’s very excited.
However, he’s not so excited when he gets there and realizes his seat’s in the back of the stadium.
So he looks around him for a better seat, and to his surprise he finds an empty seat right next to the field.
He approaches the older guy who’s sitting in the seat next to the empty one and asks if the seat is taken.
The man replies, “No.”
The young guy is very surprised to hear this and asks, “How could someone pass up a seat like this?”
The older guy replies, “It’s my wife’s seat. We’ve been to every Super Bowl together since the day we were married but she’s passed away.”
“Oh, how sad,” the young guy says, taken aback. “I’m sorry to hear that, but couldn’t you find a friend or relative to come with you?”
“No,” the man replies, “They’re all at the funeral.”
where do you find a dog with no arms or legs -where you left it
How do you know if someone is a vegan or has run a marathon?
They'll tell you.
Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock “Who’s there?” Not Susie.
A couple is on their first date. Man: How do you feel about sex? Woman: I like it infrequently. Man: I see. Is that one word or two?
It was dinner in the plane and the flight attendant asked the passenger if he would like dinner "What are my choices?"the passenger said.? "Yes or No," the flight attendant replied.
My mother really hates my dad for some reason. Maybe it was because he cheated on her, or maybe because it was her mom. Either way it really ruined her birthday.
Sign outside a hair salon: We'll color your hair or dye trying.
If this post gets 200 likes or comments I will show up in a mrbeast video
If somebody cuts their leg off and hits you with it. Works they be kicking or hitting you?
Friend 1. whats your favorite drink or food Friend 2. pizza Friend 3. Donuts Friend 4. i don't eat food but i do drink bleach Friend 1. (calling the suicide hotline) Friend 2. (Calling the parents)
Imagine Michael Jackson having kids ? Would come out Black or white or plastic 😂
A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone. It’s either terrible news or great news.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
So i was sitting with my little brother and talk about our dreams. "What do you wanna be when you grow up?" I asked him. He answered "A doctor!". I wanted to tease him so i said "I wouldn't be treated by a doctor like you". I was hoping he would get mad or something but instead, he calmly replied "Brother, i said doctor. Not a vet"
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
