One jokes

What is one thing blind people and orphans have in common?

They both can't see their parents.

So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.

When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"

He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."

Horrible Jokes, Part One- A friend of mine got into photographing salmon in different clothing. He said he liked shooting fish in apparel.

I rate you 9 out of 10, because I'm the 1 you need.

What do you call it when everyone of your friends makes too many dumb Covid jokes? A pundemic.

Jesus and Satan are just basically Homer and Flanders. One tries to help the other, only for Satan to just say, "Shut up!"

Why did the orphan try to get hurt?

Because then they would get surrounded with people who care about him.

He looks around, no one is there.

I like my girlfriend's new secondary school uniform, I guess, but doesn’t beat her old primary school one. 😀

One day my mom told me to take out the trash, and I did. The next day, mom asked me, "Where is your sister?" and I said, "A garbage truck took her." Mom started running to try and get the truck before it left.

Don't let mistakes drag you down. My dad made one mistake, but it ended up fulfilling the 5-year plan of heat energy generation in less than a millisecond.

It's always fun to take anti-depressants, you either choose to take one, or the whole bottle.

My cousin said being gay was such a pain in the ass and I asked him why and I said, "Cuz you get buttfucked?" and he said, "No, I get made fun of." and I said, "Why? Cuz you get buttfucked?" and he said, "No, turd." Then I said, "Wow, at least I'm not the one with real pains in my ass, bro."

I know what you did with your mom last night, the orphan. Nah, jit trippin', you thought I had one?

My wife went to Niagara Falls and fell. She broke every bone in her body.

One year later, she recovered. She slipped on an orange peel and died.

I wanted another piece of pizza... but she said I could only have One Piece.

My dad and I were fishing one day.

That’s where he met my stepmom.

One depressed kid goes to high-five a tree, but the tree just left him hanging.

What did one copper say to the other? C U.

There are too many suicidal people in this world. I’m going to make sure there is at least one less.

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.