One jokes

I called an Asian person and asked, 'Is this Mister Wing?' 'No.'

I called once more and asked, 'Is this Mister Wong?' 'No.'

I guess I 'winged the Wong number.'

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.

What's the difference between your birth and 9/11?

One was planned.

What's the difference between 911 and a Mexican gardener?

One of them is an outside job.

What’s the difference between a female farmer and Hitler’s girlfriend?

One bails her hay, and the other heils her bae.

Why don't Chinese children believe in Santa?

Because they're the ones making the toys.

I rate you 9 out of 10, because I'm the 1 you need.

What's a benefit of being an orphan?

No one makes yo mama jokes to you.

What do you call it when everyone of your friends makes too many dumb Covid jokes? A pundemic.

So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.

When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"

He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."

What’s the difference between an orphan and a leaf? Only one falls down the family tree.

What is the difference between an orphan and a TV?

One has more channels.

Who cooks in a lesbian relationship?

Neither one of them, they eat out.

One time my dad was an orphan, so I questioned where he learned to parent.

Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.

If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.

Two Indians are walking beside a river...

One reaches down into the mud and runs it through his fingers.

"The White Man was here."

"How can you tell?"

"We're speaking English, aren’t we?"

There are too many suicidal people in this world. I’m going to make sure there is at least one less.

There are two siblings, a little brother and a big brother. Now, the big brother had a girlfriend, and one night they decided to go and have sex. So, the bigger brother goes to pick up his girlfriend one night and take her home. So they get to the bigger brother's house and walk into his room. Now the two siblings shared the room, and they had bunk beds. When they walked in the room, they saw the little brother asleep in the bottom bunk, so they went up to the top bunk to have sex. The big brother says, "Whenever you feel good, say 'lettuce,' and whenever you want to switch positions say 'tomato'." The girl constantly is saying "lettuce, tomato," and then the little brother wakes up. He quietly remarks, "Can you guys stop making sandwiches? You're getting mayonnaise all over me."

When I was little, I would pray to Jesus every night for him to get me a new bike. I learned one week in Sunday school that that's not how it works, so instead, I just stole one and asked him for forgiveness.

You're cheap; no one even pays attention.