One jokes
The ketchup told a joke. No one was laughing, but the egg was cracking up!
What do you call Panera bread that has been weathered and eventually gathered and via cementation and pressure, it becomes a layer of different materials and is also one of the most common types of rock in the sea?
Panera Sed!
Anne Frank: This one time at camp, someone had too much gas.
Math Teacher: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?"
Student: "A drinking problem."
There's a one-story house. Everything's yellow, even the kitchen, living room, and bedrooms. What color are the stairs?
Pussies and tits have one thing in common: they're both made for kids, but men end up licking or suckling them.
When does a pentagon have 4 sides?
When a plane is in one of the sides.
The orphan wanted to call home sick, but there was no one.
The orphan went to school to have food, but there was no money in his account.
One man said, "The audacity on that deaf kid!"
The other man said, "Bro, does he even have audio?"
I'm still wondering who took Jesus' sandals.
Even the one who ate that dove that sat at Jesus' shoulder. 🤔
When you're watching a 9/11 documentary, that one kid in your class finds the 97th Jenga block and knocks it down.
Why do orphans miss every hit? Because no one is cheering for them.
Your mom was dating a boy that had a twin brother, but she did it with the wrong one.
How many beans are there in Irish chili?
Answer: 239
Why are there two hundred and thirty-nine?
Answer: (spoken in Irish Brogues) Because if you add one more, it'd be "two farty."
For me, the best part of depression is remaining charming around strangers but saving the misery for the ones who love you.
So, one day I have a wife, but if it's getting a longer day, she is moving so weird, and I see she has sex with Rick Astley. 😂 [rickrolled]
What would you do after seeing your most loved one shot? Reload.
Two nuns in a bathtub.
One nun asks, "Where's the soap?"
The other nun says, "It sure does."
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Three men walk into a bar. The 1st says, "Hey, how's it going?" The 2nd one says, "Great!" But then the 3rd man says, "Hello, where did my wife go? I swear she was just here!" What happened to the 3rd guy's wife?