Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number. You answered the wrong telephone.
Numbers Jokes
There's 10 kind of people in the world. Those who know binary and those who don't.
I was going to buy a pocket calculator. But then I thought, who cares how many pockets I have?
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8.
I lent a hot girl my umbrella yesterday. That takes the number of girls I've made wet this year to -1.
4, 6, 8, and 9 have all been killed. 2, 3, 5, 7, and 11 are the prime suspects.
6:30 is the best time on a clock... hands down.
What do prime numbers and stoners have in common? The higher they are, the more spaced out they get.
I can count the number of times I've been to Chernobyl on one hand. -- It's seven.
What's the number one pick up line at a gay bar?
"May I push your stool in?"
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second one orders half a beer. The third one orders a fourth of a beer. The bartender stops them, pours two beers, and says, "You guys should know your limits."
How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
It's some weird number. You probably never heard of it.
Whenever I have a one night stand, I always use protection.
A fake name and a fake phone number.
Why do shepherds never learn to count?
Because if they did, they would always be falling asleep.
There are 10 types of people in this world.
Those that know binary and those that don't.
