Number

Number jokes

I went out with this girl the other night. She wore this real slinky number. She especially looked great going down the stairs.

He's got a massive f*cking cock, Ayew, Ayew. He tucks it in his football sock, Ayew, Ayew. Shagged a bird and now she's dead, Swung his cock around her head, Jordan Ayew Palace number nine.

And there's the referee taking down Ronaldo's number.

Not really the time or the place, but it's good to see that we've kept homophobia out of football.

6 looks like someone facing up.

9 looks like someone facing down.

69 looks like 2 people sucking each other's dicks.

In 2006 on 6/9, there was something called communication opportunity happened. On 6/9. 69. Coincidence? I think NOT.

Q: My scale had my phone number on it. Wandering why, I looked up only to see an elephant in my face...

So, I was in school, and there was a number saying "696969," so I said to my mother, "What does it mean?" She said, "Your fucking dad and I!"

So, I went up to an Australian girl. She looked like she was 20, and I said, "Can I have your phone number, sweetheart?" She said, "696969." I said, "Oh, haha, okay." A few days later, her mother called me and said she's 15.

How many times can you subtract 10 from 100?

Once. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90.

A guy walks into a bar, he's like, "What's your number, lad?" and the woman is like, "298-777-fatso.com" and he walked home depressed.

A man gave me 1 dollar that was ripped and laughed away. I wonder why he did that.

He did that on purpose to trick me, then I met him in the threes.

Why did the number 5 get voted out of the game in the 1st round? Because he was an odd man out!