Not jokes
Why did the orphan not call 911 when he saw a tower catch fire?
'Cause he did not want any kids to go through the same pain.
Why can't orphans be robbers?
Because they're not wanted.
You are so fat that the last time you stepped on the weighing scale, the doctor said, "I want your weight and not [your] phone number."
Sister, you're ugly.
Other sister: I'm not your reflection.
PS. Sorry if it is not funny.
I got a PS5 for my nine-year-old sister. At the time, I thought it was the best trade I’d ever made. But now I’m regretting not being able to molest her anymore.
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar.
After a few drinks, the giraffe falls over and dies. The man begins to walk out when the bartender stops him.
“Hey, you can’t leave that lyin’ there!” The bartender yells out.
The man turns around: “It’s not a lion. It’s a giraffe.”
Why are orphans so naughty at school? It's not like the teacher is gonna call their parents.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
The picture gets hung with one nail, not two.
A man from Brooklyn is arguing with an Englishman. He says things like,
"It's an elevator, not a lift!"
and
"It's a bathroom! Not 'washroom'!"
He keeps going on until the Englishman says,
"Hey wanker, it's a school, not a god damned shooting range."
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Not Susie!"
My parents said to me, "Whenever you say sorry to someone and they say, 'It's okay,' it's really not."
So I said, "Okay."
What's the difference between you and me? You're not strangling a man with a cloak on.
They used to laugh when I said I wanted to be a comedian.
Well, they're not laughing now!
What do Hiroshima and Herobrine have in common?
They're not heroes.
A girl walks up to her blind friend who she had not seen in a while and says: "Long time no see!"
What's worse than a failed suicide, you ask?
I fail suicide because you forgot to do the dishes and your parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you, not yourself.
Why was the Cheetah not allowed to do tests?
Because it always cheated.
Dark jokes are just like food.
Not everyone gets it.
Not even the FBI knows where an orphan's parents are.
Patient: Where are you taking me, doctor?
Doctor: The morgue.
Patient: Hang on! I'm not dead yet!
Doctor: And we're not there yet!