Not jokes

OK, OK, what's up with the fake Gwens? I am going to use a test to see who is real or not.

The real Gwen will know this. When did I come onto this website? Next question, what is my real name, and do I go on cursing rampages? Only the real Gwen can complete this test with the right answers.

Guy: Hi, how was your day today?

Woman: Good!

Guy: *Well I can’t ask her out cause she’s pregnant*

Guy: How many months pregnant are you?

Woman: What to you mean?!?! Also, I’m not pregnant.

A girl walks up to her blind friend who she had not seen in a while and says: "Long time no see!"

"Never going to give you up." That's not what the orphan's parents said.

This ole boy picked up a hooker one time and she gave him the clap. In a few days, he saw her again, and he went up to her and said, "Hey, you gave me the clap!" She said, "NO I DID NOT! I sold it to ya!"

What do you call a German that is blind? A not-see.

Tongue Trick Sex: The Movie.

Not coming soon!

Hey, wake up. I just murdered your family, but I live alone.

Then who are these people in your house? They are people in my house? Well, not anymore, dumb bitch. You're welcome, you could have died.

Dear Gwen and Prince,

Gwen and Prince, sorry for being mean and cussing and other messed up nonsense. To be honest, I really just wanted to be your friends, all both of you! BTW Prince, Gwen is not dating Aiden...I don't even know who Aiden is! Sorry a million times, Zreina.

Why does the orphan not buy milk?

That's what their parents are doing.

I ought to complain to Spotify for you not being named this week’s hottest single.

Imagine not having a dad.

My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets."

I tried my best using phone sex online, but the thing about it is the holes cannot fit through.

A: Why did the orphan not come to school today?

B: Because today we had a parent meetup.

I would rather do my own laundry, not my uncle's laundry, because I ain't no damn butler like Alfred from Batman. I don't live in no damn Batcave by Gotham tity.

I'm not sure how I'm going to get to Heaven.

God had not built a ramp yet... or an escalator.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar... Yeah.

(Not Original Joke)

What part in the body does an adult not need but actually needs to live?

A KIDNey!

Why did the boy drop his ice cream?

Because he got hit by a truck.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Europe.

Europe who?

No, I'm not a poo, you're a poo.