Out of a total population of 1.3 billion no one in Africa actually speaks African.
Me: *finds out my dad's an orphan* No one: Literally no one: Me:Time to make his life hellđ
Teacher: Now class, if you are dumb, please stand up. Class: no one stands up. Teacher: Oh câmon. I know someone over here is dumb.*waves her finger around the left side of the room* Little Johnny: *stands up* Teacher: Oh, Johnny, you think youâre dumb? Little Johnny: No, I just feel bad youâre standing alone.
Why is the orphan sad for dinner? He has no one to eat with him at the table
two terrorists walk into a bar and the bartender says what can i get you the terrorists both say a beer the baretender overhears them talking that they will 300 people and a donkey the baretender says why a donkey and one terrorist says c i told you no one would care about the people
You're cheap; no one even pays attention.
But you could get plastic surgery and look 20 years younger, with that, no one will suspect you!
Orphans can be gay no problem because they have no one to disown them
Why donât violists play hide and seek?
Because no one will look for them.
Whatâs the difference between a onion and a viola? No one cries when they cut up the viola
Don't mistake my silence for weakness. No one plans a murder out loud.
To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him. âGet under my robes,â says the nun. âNo one will look for you there.â The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, âHey, thatâs a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.â âYeah, well if you look a bit higher youâll see a fine set of balls,â replies the nun. âI didn't want to get drafted either.â
For all those Simpsons fans out there this one I'm sure you know Abe: It's rotten being old. No one listens to you Lisa: It's awful being a kid. No one listens to you Homer: I'm a white male, aged 18-49. Everyone listens to me-- no matter how dumb my suggestions are
My teacher asked the class to stand up if your dumb, no one did so she said â comon someone must be dumbâ and pointed over to the left side of the class room , lil Jonny stands up , âdo you think ur dumb ,lil Jonny ?â Asked the teacher ,âno I just feel bad for you , your the only one who whoâs stood up â replied lil Jonny!
Hey guys. I just wanted to say, while I think some rape jokes can be funny, not one of these are. In fact, I find them pretty horrifying.
I was raped when I was fourteen (about six years ago), and I have made one rape joke in my entire life when, last year, I said "I don't fuck with rapists, I just get fucked by them." I thought it was funny. No one else did, and they were probably right in that.
My point is this: rape jokes CAN be funny when they are used by victims as a way of coping with trauma. They CANNOT be funny when they are made about raping someone else. Even if there is a difference between joking about raping someone and raping someone, it is absolutely disgusting to think such a horrific crime is funny, and I am sure at least some of the posters on this page have already crossed the line into committing rape.
Great material for social scientific research, though, gentlemen. Really well done.
When a women removes polish with chemicals, no one bats an eye. But when Hitler removes the Polish with chemicals, everyone loses it...
What do Jesus and I have in common? No one knows my real bday either
FREE MY ĂIGGA EDP HE INNOCENT ONCE UPON A TIME I WENT OVER TO HIS HOUSE AND HE FARTED SO GAHDAMN MUCH INTO MY MOUTH THAT I STARTED DROOLING A HERSHEY WATERFALL THIS ĂIGGA IS SO SEXY AND I LOVE WHEN HE SITS HIS FAT ASS ON TOP OF ME TYSON U JUST JEALOUS YOU AINâT GOT NO ONE LIKE BRYANT U RETARDED LOOKING ASS BITCH I DARE YOU TO GET A PARTNER AS LOYAL AND INNOCENT AS EDP FREE MY ĂIGGA BIG HOMIE CHEESE HEAD 474747 HE INNOCENT
Why are orphans so bad at dodgeball? Because no one misses them.
Why canât orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
