I did this to my x I stole her wheal chair I new she would come crawling back
Why did the chiken cross the road? to get to your moms house Knock Knock you: whos there? Your new father!
Aaaah I really wish Stephen hawking was an organ donor...
I really need some new part to my gokart
I got the new phone with longer lasting battery but it still lasts longer than your relationships ooooooooooo
Mom:Dont forget to unload the dishwasher
Mom:did you finish ur homework?
Mom:We are going to ur grandmothers house for thanksgiving
Mom:Dad and i talked we are getting a new car next month
Son:u are?? oh my gosh thank you
Mom:No i was just making sure you were getting my texts
Son:that was cruel
Dear Victims.....äh Passengers, we are flying now from Ryadh to New York. Amazing Building...äh Amazing City. Theres online but 2000 there ware two Towers.....äh Restaurants. We Hijack the plane....äh Hi Jack. Jack is my Co-pilot and i said hello. Don‘t scream...History Repea..äh.. History never comes back, we are now flying back to the Airport“💀
I'm making a new movie, it's called "veggie tale's" My star actor is Stephen Hawking's
What do you call New York City? A human Zoo
Just got a new internet connected toaster. It wouldnt work until I enabled Pop Ups
NEWS: A man kidnamed a 13 year old girl MOM OF GIRL: The man had a shady face and a receeding hairline
My son wore his new 'Go Vegan' Hoodie for the first time today and already he's been verbally abused as well as being punched, kicked & spat on!!!! And he's not even left the house yet!!!
New BBC Geordie police drama set in Honolulu
Haway Five O
New business idea lets put a KFC on Africa and a watermelon shop
Hi I'm new here
Osama binladin
Got like 2,997 kills damn thats a new record
If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey, what would Delaware?
Idaho...Alaska!
Hey! Guess what? I created a new word!
Plagiarism!
You can give a hockey team airplane a new source of heating but it went to far on September 7th, 2011 when the Yaroslavl plane crash happened.
confusion life question!!! . can you cry underwater? . do fishes ever get thirsty? . why don't birds fall out the tree when the sleep? . why is a building called that when its already built? . when they say dog food is new and improved, who taste is?
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
