Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Surgery

  • When you ask for plastic surgery, they said, "We could not fix you, but the only way is to wear a mask to fix your ugly face."

    Rape

  • Rape can happen to anybody, so I think I will continue taking the short cut home through the dark alleyways, wearing barely anything and walk really close to bushes.

  • 5
  • Candice

  • Me: Hey Siri, did you know Candice died?

    Siri: Yes, I was informed she died from sugondese.

    Me: What is that?

    Siri: Sugondese nuts.

    Chip

  • (True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”

    And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”

  • 1
  • Fat

  • You’re so fat,

    that your family moved to the other side of the U.S.A., but they still see you.

    Fat

  • You’re so fat that when you sit on the toilet, it says, “A B C D E F G, get your butt off of me!”