Worst Jokes Ever
What is life?
Why did the bike fall over?
'Cause it was wheely tired.
How many babies does it take to change a lightbulb?
More than 9 because my basement's still dark.
Sex sex sex free sex tonight, I mean 666-3629.
Why was the German in a hurry?
Because he was Rush-ian to get to work.
You know what I saw today?
Everything I looked at.
Your mom.
What do lady dogs (bitches) wear to work?
Pant suits.
Woman: "Doctor, where are we going?"
Doctor: "To the morgue."
Woman: "I'm not dead yet, doctor."
Doctor: "We're not at the morgue yet, either."
How did the air beat me at chess? It did that thing, haha!
It was so windy I saw a chicken lay the same egg twice!
What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?
A flat major.
What do you call a bulldog and a shih tzu? A bullshit.
The lady was so fat that when she stepped on the scale, the scale responded with, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"
What do you call 8 x 3.14?
Octopi.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and my computer?
When my computer crashes, I actually give a fuck.
How did Stephen Hawking die? He lost Wi-Fi connection.
What is a doll's favorite dog? A doll-matian.
Knock knock. Who's there? Ieatmop. I eat mop who? Eww, you eat your poo?
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A nectarine.