Worst Jokes Ever
What is Hawking's number one song? The Beach Boys: "I Get Around."
Don't worry, Stephen Hawking isn't dead.
They have just got to copy and paste his memory onto a USB.
Dark humor never gets old, just like children with cancer.
Have you seen the new movie "Constipated"?
No, it hasn't come out yet.
What noise does Stephen Hawking make when he dies? Windows shutting down theme tune.
Who is Stephen Hawking?
These jokes are nearly as dead as Steven Hawkings.
Where did Stephen Hawking go when he wanted to get drunk? The Genius Bar.
Stephen Hawking never wrote a book... it was a Dragon who was naturally speaking.
What happened the night Stephen Hawking came home wasted?
Nothing... wife couldn’t tell.
Stephen Hawking tried joining some music bands, but all of them rejected him... except Daft Punk.
Stephen Hawking was an unfaithful man. He had an affair with Alexa.
I met him once, but he wouldn’t give me his autograph!
Stephen Hawking's death was purely accidental. He clicked “shut-down” instead of “sleep”.
What's the best part about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
What did the little boy say to the fat man?
How many Japs did you get?
Girls are like blackjack; you shoot for 21, but I keep hitting 14.
What's red and bubbly and scratches at the microwave glass?
A baby in the microwave!
What's 72?
69 with 3 people watching.
What did Stephen Hawking say on the stairway to heaven?
Oh, fuck! I can’t get up them.