Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?

An irrel-elephant ;)

I took an Uber home the other day, and the bastard was swerving all over the road and driving on the shoulder... I said, "Who the f*ck taught you to drive?" To this, he replied, "Stevie Wonder."

I was talking to this absolutely gorgeous woman, and I asked her, “What do you do?” And she said, “I’m a brain surgeon.” And I don’t know if this makes me sexist or not, but I was really impressed.

Most women can’t pull off sarcasm.

I've been looking for my ex-girlfriend's killer for the past two years.

But no one would do it.

There was a Mexican magician. He was going to disappear on the count of three.

1-2-..... and he left without a trace.

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  • Guys, I guess with all these storms there was a power cut in his house.

    The fact that "Hawkins" rhymes with "walking" and "talking," yet he could never do any of them.

    Stephen Hawking tried comedy.

    His first line ruined it. "You know what I can't stand? Let me rephrase that, you know what? I can't stand."