Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a belt made of watches? A waste of time.
Two lesbians adopted a cat. That night, the cat ran away. Why?
Because it heard one say, "I'm gonna eat that pussy."
What’s the difference between someone who is high on the spectrum [and] low on the spectrum? At least I can write this joke.
I'm psychicking your butt.
What do you call a policeman/farmer?
A farmer in blue!
What has more brains than Kurt Cobain?
The wall behind him.
Why didn’t the turkey cross the road?
To prove that he was not chicken.
How do you recover from prostate cancer surgery?
It’s all Depends!
What do you call a malignant cell in Paris?
A Royale with cancer.
How would you best describe prostate cancer?
Well, it is somewhere between a dick and an asshole!
What's the difference between a Demon and a Redhead?
The Demon at least has a trade offer.
Why do they have air conditioning in hospitals?
To keep all the vegetables fresh.
What's Al-Qaeda's favorite sports team?
The New York Jets.
You're American when you go in the bathroom, and you're American when you come out, but what are you when you are still in the bathroom? European (you're-a-peein').
Fatty and Skinny were in a bed.
Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was dead.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn’t have any arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.
I don't know if this is a joke or a question, but:
If killing yourself sends you to hell, where does sitting in the waiting room get you?
Want to know why some astronomers are gay?
It’s because they want to be in Uranus.
What did the cancer cell say to its neighbor?
"Mind if I join you?"
Lil Johnny looked a lil bonny, but then when he saw Tommy, he decided to bomb me.