Worst Jokes Ever
What do you say after you go out for middle eastern food? I falafel (feel awful)!
What's hard about walking through a bunch of dead babies?
My dick.
Johnny Johnny?
Yes pa pa.
Eating sugar?
Yes pa pa, I am eating sugar because it is the only thing I can reach and you have refused to feed me for the past 3 days. You smoke 2 packs of cigs a day and you're mad at me for eating a little sugar. Smoking? Telling lies? Yes pa pa, you do all of those things because you're a chronic addict.
Two men walked into a bar, and one man asked for H20, and the other man asked for H20 too.
Only one man came out alive.
Someone is adding dirt to my garden!
The plot thickens!
Yo mom!
What do you call a school shooting survivor who grows up to be a prostitute on the West Coast?
A Sandy Hooker
What do you do when you get rid of prostate cancer?
Cell-ablate!
There is a man and a woman on a date.
The woman asked what kind of things do you love?
The table starts to lift up on the man's side and the man says sorry.
Santa Claus walks up to three little girls and says, "Ho, ho, ho!"
Say what you want about pedophiles, but at least they drive slow through school zones.
Joke
Hi, my name is Jeff.
I'm autistic.
A receptionist at the Twin Towers orders two pepperoni pizzas. She was upset when she got two planes.
"Hippity hoppity, women are my property."
I went to a truck on wheels, they said, "Wheel feed you."
Ur dick.
How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a lil' boogie in it ;)
A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. They come across an old shack with three burlap sacks. They each hop into one of them. The police come and kick the one with the brunette in it. She goes, "Mew, mew." The police say, "Oh, it's just a bag of kittens." Then they kick the one with the redhead. "Woof, woof." They think, "Oh, it's just a bag of puppies." Then they kick the one with the blonde in it. She goes, "POTATOES!!" And gets arrested.