Worst Jokes Ever
A 90 year old man takes a Viagra.
Strips off naked, lies down in an alley way. Three chicks walk on by: a blond, a brunette, and a red head.
The red head said, "I'm not letting that go to waste," so she strips off and rides him. When she's finished,
The brunette then strips off naked and rides him. The blond's now worried because she just got her period. The red head sez, "He's dead. Don't let it go to waste," so she strips off naked and rides him. Then he wakes up. He then says, "Wow, two jump starts and a blood transfusion. I'm good to go!"
Look at your left hand, now look at your right hand, and tell yourself, "Which hand do you cheat with?"
Wanking.
If you want a joke, look at yourself in the mirror!
Billy got a bike and a soccer ball for his birthday from his uncle, but he was very upset. Why? Because he has no legs.
How did the flight attendant want their burger?
Just plane!
What's a similarity between your best friend and a tree?
They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.
How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall red?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?
A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!
Can orphans eat at a family restaurant?
If you are ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
It said to submit a joke, and that's what my mom did when I was born.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
Sun: Hi, I am the sun! I want to warm you up......
Human: :D
Sun: I want to BuRn you.........
Human: .......
Sun: I want to...... KILL...... you.....
Human: I should be going now.
Sun: LET ME KILL YOU!
Human: *Screams his last sound*
Stephen Hawking died because his wheelchair couldn’t run Windows 10.
I read a book on anti-gravity...
It was impossible to put down.
Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
He got hit by a bus.
They finally made a movie about a clock, about time.
"I asked my friend what his height is?" He answered, "I'm sans'sational!"
"Wheel" all miss him, right?