Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

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One dog said to the other dog, "Man, it is hard sleeping on the floor."

The other said, "Really? I like my bed."

What's the difference between a spare tire and dead hookers? I don't have 8 spare tires in my trunk.

What's the difference between my car and a hooker? I park my car in a garage instead of leaving it on the side of the road.

  • 0

    • A rich man paid for a trip to space, but he couldn't go because the rocket was damaged. He received a refund and an apology.

    I'm treated like God when I'm home, I'm usually ignored until someone wants something.

    Yo mama is so ugly, even the ugliest person in the world looked like a sword standing next to her.

    Why did Timmy throw the clock out the window?

    It reminded him of Arnold Clock, the man convicted of knife raping his wife.

  • 1

    • A blonde texts her husband on a cold winter’s morning: "Windows frozen, won't open."

    Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer."

    Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now."

  • 3

    • A man gets captured by cannibals.

    Every day they poke him with spears and use his blood to wash down their food. Finally the guy calls the chief over and says, "You can kill me or you can eat me, but I'm tired of getting stuck for drinks."

    I was driving through a neighborhood when I saw a sign that said "Autistic Child Zone." Then I thought to myself, "Oh shit, that wasn't a dog!"

  • 1

    • What's the difference between a dog and a rapist?

    At least the rapist adds a bit of foreplay before he starts humping people.