Worst Jokes Ever
Always practice safe sex: paint an X on the sheep that kick.
Why did little Billy drop his ice cream cone?
Cuz he got hit by a bus while crossing the street.
There's three kids: Little Drop, Little Feather, and Little Brick. Little Feather goes, "Mommy, why do you call me L'feather?" She answers, "Cuz a little feather fell over your head when you were born." L'Drop asks his mom, "Mommy, why do you call me L'drop?" She answers, "Cuz a little drop fell on your head when you were born." L'brick goes, "aafddkcasgbklcdahjkcbgtnhrfn."
What is similar about the feelings of a girl's birth daddy and her new pimp daddy?
They both worry about how she will turn out!
Why does the pimp always use job fairs as a way of recruiting new hoes?
He always gets a great turnout.
Why did the child cross the road?
To get to the church.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The Priest... Let's go to my office, because I'm totally not a pedophile.
When a lady gets married, what does she borrow?
She borrows her husband's last name.
I heard a joke about heavy metal earlier. It was pretty ironic.
Wow! That whiteboard is remarkable!
They say string theory is hanging on by a thread.
At first I was skeptical, but the universe has really grown on me.
What do you get when you cross a belt and a watch?
A waist of time.
They laughed at my crayon drawing.
I laughed at their chalk outline.
If sex with three people is called a "threesome" and sex with two people is called a "twosome," then I know why people call you handsome!
Question: How did the cat cross the river?
Answer: It didn’t, it drowned.
Why did the chipmunk swim on its back?
To keep its nuts dry.
How did two retarded people get ran over in one second?
They're my friends.
What did the cat say when she stubbed her toe?
"(Me)owwww!"
What did A say to Y?
"You cannot be alpha like me." :)
Y said, "Why? (Y)"
What is Michael Jordan's favorite coffee place? Dunkin' Donuts.