Worst Jokes Ever
This is supposed to be worst puns but most of them are not puns.
1: I wish my cancer could kill me quicker so I don't have to do this class anymore.
2: I'm dying, finally.
3: I'm sorry, I can't go to your party because I'm expected to be dead by then.
On a serious note, I might actually have cancer and I'm getting checks. I hope for the best :/
Three people having sex is a threesome; two people is a twosome. So next time someone calls you "handsome," don't take it as a compliment.
If at first you don't succeed,
Maybe Russian Roulette isn't for you.
I hate it when people are at my house and ask, "Do you have a bathroom?" What answer are they expecting? "No, we pee in the yard?"
My great grandfather died in 9/11.
He was an amazing pilot.
What did Steven Hawking say?
Nothing.
If you're feeling numb, use your thumb.
You might be innocent, but if you carry a large sum of cash in public, the cops won’t believe that.
Why was it so hot in a square room? Because all the corners are 90 degrees.
A man was hitting a woman with his d*ck. Someone ran up to the man and said, "That's domestic violence!" The man replied with, "No, it's not domestic violence, it's dumbass-d*ck violence!"
There's no "I" in team, but there is a "U" in cunt.
I would have told you about a chemistry joke, but I wouldn't get a reaction.
You're gay, except it...
What does a phone and a grandma have in common? They both die.
What's the difference between them? If you shove something up your grandma's ass, she won't come back to life.
I will remember my biker buddy's last words: "Why did you cut in front of me?"
What's fast and almost got away?
A Mexican jumping the border.
What is red, green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs?
...A girl scout that got hit by a car.
My life, there, that was the joke.
T-Series.