Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Add joke

What was the movie about the dog called?

The woof of Wall Street.

My girlfriend lives a few miles away from me.

The other night, she called me at around 3 AM. She was terrified. She said that there were two armed gunmen in her apartment.

With all that adrenaline going through my system, it made it hard to go back to sleep.

  • 4

    • It was 7:00 a.m. when Billy ran downstairs after a long night of sleep. He got to the kitchen where his mother and father sat. "What would you like for breakfast?" Billy's mom asked politely. Billy replied with, "Whatever Dad gave you last night in your bedroom would be great! You seemed to like it very much!"

    How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?

    Must be more than 9, my basement is still dark!

    These two guys were at a bar flirting with these girls. The guy says, "Are you a parking ticket, 'cause you got fine written all over you?"

    The girl turns and says, "How about you pay for them, and then I can pay you back with me getting all over you?"

    All my life I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to achieve something.

    Now, after messing up my life at every possible chance, I finally realize that what I really want is to have been someone after following through with one thing.

    Me: What’s that girl’s name from Phineas and Ferb, the sister?

    Crush: Candice.

    Me: Candice dick fit in your mouth?

    Crush: *slaps me, walks away*

  • 2

    • What's the difference between an air blower and Little Boy?

    When the air blower blew, it did not wipe out Hiroshima.