Worst Jokes Ever
Why was Timmy the only happy person in his family?
Timmy is dead.
I can measure the speed of an object, because I want to km/s.
PORNHUB
Craig Duncan is a child soldier with bad breath and has killed 5 people (on Fortnite).
What do you call your mom when she goes into the shower?
A shower ma! (shawarma)
What do you call Stephen Hawking on pot?
Pot wheels.
What burns up a football stadium?
A football match.
Rhydon- son.
Rhydon? - mum.
RHYDON DEEZ NUTS! - son.
Jeez, ur like ur father in bed- mum.
XD
What song is sung when conceiving?
"Let's Get Physical, Physical!"
I sucked your mom's anus.
What music do Astronauts listen to?
Nep-tunes.
Where are fart bombs made?
Old people's arses!
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It don't matter what you call it. It ain't coming.
Who are the Fastest Readers in the world?
9/11 victims: They read 87 stories in 10 seconds.
I followed the sun for a day (stood there at noon). I found myself at the same spot.
What's the difference between you and an idiot? Not very much if you reword and post the same joke over and over.
There once were 3 men on an airplane and one bit into an apple and said, "This is disgusting!" and threw it out the window. The 2nd man bit into a banana and said, "This is rotten!" and he threw it out the window. The 3rd man bit into a bomb and screamed, "ALL MY TEETH FELL OUT!" and he threw it out the window.
Meanwhile, on the ground, a police officer was walking and he saw a kid crying and he went up to him and asked him why he was crying. He replied, "An apple came flying out of the sky and hit me on the head!" The police officer said, "That is weird," and kept on walking. Then he saw another kid crying and the police officer asked, "Why are you crying?" and he answered, "A banana came flying out of the sky and hit me on the head!" The officer said, "This has been a strange day." Then he sees a kid laughing and he asked why he was laughing and he said, while he was laughing, "My dad farted and the house blew up!"
Q: What do you call a cranky cow?
A: Moooooooody.
What do you call a cow eating grass?
A Lawn Moo-er.
Hey, stinks, you know why? 'Cause your butts dry!