Worst Jokes Ever

Knock, knock. Who's there? Me.

Never attempt to foreshadow your own death, you may end up regretting it. You can chop me up and throw me in the fridge if I’m wrong.

Person one: What did the DJ name his son?

Person two: IDK, what?

Person one: Erik (while making a DJ motion).

What do you call a cow that is secret?

AnonyMOOus.

Daughter: Dad, what's your opinion on abortions?

Dad: Ask your sister.

Daughter: But I don't have a sister.

Dad: Exactly.

Why can't the T-Rex clap?

Because they're extinct!

Why did Helen Keller have a yellow leg?

Her dog was blind, too.

What did the cow say when he lost his tractor?

"Where's my tractor?"

What was the last pizza order at the World Trade Center?

Two large planes.

Listen, my friends say I am gay, but I tell them I am not because I am not happy. In fact, I have no life. You are my friend. I trust you with my life. Now, can you take it?

Why can’t an orphan play baseball?

Because they can’t find home.

Chuck Norris used to be an orphan.

Because some families were too scared of his bravery to adopt him.

Say "lettuce" and spell "cup."

Teacher: What does the pig's skin do?

Student: It keeps pig skin together! 😂

If we get this to 1000 dislikes, I will do TWO joking keggars on Halloween.

So what are you waiting for? Hit the button, idiot.

Life's like a dick. Women make it hard for no reason.

What do you call a racist crow?

Jim.

How do you keep a bull from charging?

You take its credit card away.

Me: *writes Kahoot about me then finishes.*

Me and friend: *plays Kahoot.*

A question: When is (my name) happy?

Friend: *puts a good answer and gets wrong.*

Answer: Never, only a portion.

Friend: Do you need help?

What did the mommy cow say to the baby cow?

It's pasture your bedtime.