Dad: Son, you're adopted.
Son: Oh wow I wonder who my real parents are.
Dad: We are your real parents, your adopted parents are coming to pick you up.
What's a paedophile's favorite footwear?
White Vans.
I was walking home, then I saw a "Wait" sign. A man came and took me. I'm still waiting for him to ask for a lesson.
Friend A: "Why are you still a virgin, bro?"
Friend B: "I was until last night."
Friend A: "Nah, nah, who with?"
Friend B: "Your sister."
Friend A: "I don't have a sister."
Friend B: "Just wait 9 months, you'll see."
I bullied a handicap today.
What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?
I saw a little kid crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. God, I love working at an orphanage.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? THEY CANT GET THE HOME RUN!
Husband: Hey, my dear, this lunch is great. Where did you find the recipe?
Wife: In a detective novel.
What do u call a 3 humped camel Answer:a prostitute from new York 😂😂😭😭💀
My grandpa personally killed 3 German pilots. He was the worst mechanic Luftwaffe had.
A penis is driving a car when all of a sudden it gets hit by a car, what did the penis end up saying?
Aaaawwwww I got dicklash!
Roses are red. Violets are blue. We're gonna make love because I'm stronger than you.
Why do orphans only have 363 days of the year? They don't have Mother's or Father's Day.
Why did the Mexican man throw his wife out of the window...
Ta kill her.
Shoutout to gil44200ns for commenting on my post!
I was making sandcastles with my Nan, then my mum came in the room and took away the urn.
Elsa got a boyfriend, and the boyfriend wanted to try anal.
She wasn't too keen, but she just lay back and shouted "INTO THE UNKNOWN!"
Pewdiepie: I am the best YouTuber ever!
T-Series: Go away you f***!
Man A: "Is Google male or female?"
Man B: "Female, because it does not let you finish the sentence before making a suggestion."
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"
Students: "Meat."
Teacher: "Very good. Now what does the pig give you?"
Students: "Bacon."
Teacher: "And finally, what does the fat cow give you?"
One of the students: "Homework!"
