Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop.
You don't have a forehead, you have a fivehead.
You don't have dreams, you have movies.
If you wanna get fat, what's the quickest way to do it?
Eat two jars of mayo each day, and in about a month, your scale will have your phone number!
What happens when a cow masturbates?
Beef jerky.
A man walks into a bar.
if a toy from Toy Story died, the kid wouldn't know, and the other toys would just have to watch as their kid played with the corpse.
Bruh, people always makin' jokes 'bout how their dad left, well in my story it was the mum that needed milk.
"Just say no to drugs!"
Well, if I'm talking to my drugs, I probably already said yes.
People judge me because I'm quiet.
No one plans a massacre out loud.
Joe mama so fat, she could not walk the stairs of heaven.
Credits: to my friend.
Me running after slapping the emo kid's wrist and saying, "I like ya cut g."
Why didn't Logan Paul high five the Asian man? Because he loves to leave Asians hanging.
Serial murderer Ed Gein was famed for raping, killing, and skinning his victims.
When he was asked why he did it, he responded, "You don't know someone until you walk around in their skin."
A 28 year old woman, Olga, in Meshchovsk, Russia took justice into her own hands when a 32 year old male robber, Viktor, decided to rob her salon. She tied him, feeding him only Viagra, having sex with him over and over. After a few days, she released him after he stated he learned his lesson and wouldn't go to the police. He lied and went to the police anyways. Both were arrested.
After his sentence was over, Viktor sat down to speak to the local news. The reporter asked Viktor, "How was this whole ordeal?" Viktor replied, "I've had better."
Why do orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home plate.
What's a benefit of being an orphan? The chips always come in a family size :)
What do orphans call a family photo? A selfie.
Stephen Hawking said there is no god.
God said there is no Stephen Hawking.
"My sister said she was the only smart one in the class."
"What about the teacher you learn *from*?"
Tell someone to look in their shirt and spell attic. Hehe.
What did the left butt cheek say to the right butt cheek? "Together we can stop this shit!"