Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Animal

  • Producer: We need to stop testing out products on animals.

    CEO: Shampoo companies do it all the time.

    Fairchild Republic making the A-10 Thunder Bolt.

    Mother

  • Dad: Alive.

    Brother: Orphan (fault=Mother).

    Me: Dead on the inside but sadly alive.

    Mother: Alive...

    Wait a minute... I thought you were dead, Mom... Right, you're dead to me at least.

    Prince

  • Gwen: Prince, they told me you'd be crying back. What do you want?

    Prince: Nothing...BUT CAN WE GET BACK TOGETHER!?!??

    Gwen: Sorry...BUT...I have a life to live now. I'm logging off this site and going to watch some TV. I'll be back in 1 hour, but we are done...DONE...DONE.

    Puzzle

  • I have a thousand-piece puzzle of the Japanese map. It took me ages to finish it.

    But after the earthquake, I just threw all the pieces on the ground, and it's done.

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  • Love

  • Everyone has a good heart; they just don't know what to do with it. I say give someone some love. Hate is sooooo stupid. Love is soooo smart!

    Bullying

  • Gwen just wanted to help you with the bullying.

    Tip 1. Ignore them; bullies are really just cowards.

    Tip 2. Stand up for yourself; it's ok for people to also help you, but you do the same for yourself!

    Tip 3. Just let them be; they're just stupid!

    Love you-Iariah

    Bullshit

  • Kariana: Dad and mom, what is this bullshit?

    Treon: How did you find that?!

    Kariana: It was under the cabinet where you told me to put the streamers. I found these under the cabinet, did she have another sister you didn't tell me about? Now tell the truth, or else!

    Petina: Now what have we told you about going into things that are not yours!

    Kariana: I just told you to say the fricking truth, now who is Faineni? Where is she? Who is she? What is her date of birth? Why do I have her bra under here and why....IS IT UNDER THE FRICKING CABINET!!!!! ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!

    Treon: We can't!

    Kariana: BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!

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  • Punch Line

  • A teenage guy is taking a girl to a dance. First, he goes to buy her flowers, but there’s a really long line at the florist. Finally, he buys them.

    Then, he goes to rent a tux, but there’s a really long line for that, too. After a few hours, he gets the tux.

    That night, he picks up the girl and they go to the school for the dance. There’s a long line to get in that goes halfway around the school. A while later, they finally get in. They dance and talk for a while, then the guy gets thirsty, so he goes over to the table to get punch. There is no punch line.

    Relationship

  • Karien: Mom, I don't care if you're dating a new guy, I want you and Dad to be together!

    Daiana: Sometimes things don't work out, like when it didn't work between your father and me. Time to move on, Karien.

    Karien: Well I'm not moving on! I can't believe you love someone else!

    Daiana: Karien, just give him a chance. His name is Derek, he loves cooking, cleaning, and anything that has you doing something.

    Karien: That is so boring!

    Daiana: Well just work with me please?

    Karien: I'll give you a day... 24 hours, Mom!

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  • Phone Call

  • Prince might be with a new girl, but he still wants Gwen, who doesn't? Other half.

    Gwen on the phone with Prince: Prince, stop sending me letters, poems, and memes through Gmail. We broke up, it's over!

    Prince on the phone with Gwen: I know, but that new girl that I been seeing is not you! I miss you a lot! Please come back to me.

    Gwen on the phone with Prince: I'm gonna hang up now!

    Prince on the phone with Gwen: PLEASE DON'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Gwen on the phone with Prince: Sorry, I can't hear you...you're breaking up...what?!

    Prince on the phone with Gwen: Gwen! DO NOT HANG UP !!!!!!!!

    Gwen on the phone with Prince: Okay...bye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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