Worst Jokes Ever
Oh, Mom, there is poop in the toilet still.
Mom: Oh, that was me and the dog.
Me: Wait, what????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
Hi, I got fired. Oh, don't know which fire? Oh, the one that I got burned on, the volcano.
Why did the emu cross the road? Because it was the chicken's day off. Yeah, I hate myself, man.
I lost $10,000, so I killed my piggy bank, so I get a real pig and money which my money is fake, but the janitor said it is real, so I killed myself and turned into a real human.
Son, what is 1 plus 1?
Dad, I don't know.
Son, it is 2.
Dad, oh, I was gonna say 2.
Me: I want a PS5.
Dad: Alright, I will say no.
Your mom is so ugly. When she goes to the dentist, they make her face down.
What do you call a chicken staring at a pile of lettuce?
A chicken sees a salad.
(Say it out loud if you don't get it!)
Me: *Meets girl, starts to form crush* Me after I get enough courage to talk to her: “Are you a casket lid because I want you on top of me?”
“What do you call my friend group?” “Suicide Squad.”
What is a suicidal horny person's job?
A butcher.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces!! HAHAHA
Why did the orphan rob a bank?
He wanted to be wanted! 😢😂
Can watersharky and Gwen comment on this? I need to talk to you guys.
Just cut my thumb open with a knife (not a joke).
Attention to everyone, I'm not going to be on for 2 weeks because I was in a bike accident, or more like a motorcycle accident. I was ran off the road when my 16 year old brother was taking me for a ride. Now I can't use my legs cause, well, you know. I will be taking a break because I don't want to move my legs that much.
MISSING!! MISSING!! ⚠️⚠️
Name: Kylian Fraudbappe Missing: 28/6/2021 vs Switzerland Characteristics: Disappearing in big games + Diving + always ranting "give me penalty".
Possible Locations: Penalty Spot, Parc des Princes, Paris.
Last seen: Manuel Akanji’s back pocket.
I'm bored. Anybody wanna chat?
What's the difference between a redhead and an orangutan?
Some people adopt orangutans.
Which is the best sport at making fat people lose weight?
Canned hunting.
How do you call a cute door?
A-door-able.