What’s the difference between a firefighter and Snoop Dogg?
Snoop Dogg inhaled less smoke during 9/11.
What’s one thing Obama proved during his presidency?
No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he’s still going to have the cops on his back.
Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
What's the best way to catch a fish? Ask someone to throw it to you.
Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
What are the last two words you say after sex before going to sleep?
"Goodnight, Mom!"
What has 4 hairy legs and fucks my sister?
Me & my dad!
Roses are red, Violets are ugly.
Violet thought she was ugly until she saw you!
"If you can make them laugh and giggle, you can make their booty shake and jiggle."
Why are women’s feet so small?
So they can stand closer to the sink.
Why did the baby cross the road? The car seat wasn’t strapped in.
A child, molester, and priest walk into a bar.
He orders a drink.
What do you call a space Muslim?
A Tusken Raider.
Why are lesbians bad at math?
Because they can't multiply.
Why do people in Alabama like eating sandwiches? They like things in bread.
The other day I went to a museum. My friend and I went to the Holocaust section, and he got choked up when he saw the Anne Frank picture. I asked him, "Why are you sad? It's just an ashtray."
What's the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels?
Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.
What's the difference between Jedi and a rapist?
Nothing, they both use the Force to get what they want.
What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.
I taped a picture of Bill Cosby to my gun, now it's an assault rifle.
