Worst Jokes Ever
Why do men like big tits and a flat ass?
Because they got little dicks and big mouths.
What does the sign say on the hooker house after they were on lockdown?
Answer: "We're on lockdown, get lost pervert."
What does having sex with a woman and cooking an egg in a skillet have in common?
Both end with a loud annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean the shit up.
Boy: Wanna hear about my dick? Never mind, it's too short.
Girl: Wanna hear about my pussy? Fuck no, you won't get it.
A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Puerto Rican!"
Then the blonde replies, "OMG, you dirty little slut! How many is a Puerto Rican?"
What does a condom and a coffin have in common?
They both still have stiffs, but one is coming and one is going.
Why do a woman like to have sex with the lights off?
They can't stand to see a man have a good time.
What kind of shit does a ghost take every time? A spooky dookie!
My sister said that I am a baby, so I said, "Waa, waa."
What should I call a burger?
A cow burger.
I like my wife like I like my coffee: so sweet, it gives me headaches.
What did one nut say to the other nut? "The guy in the middle's a dick!"
What did Cinderella do when she got the ball?
She gagged and took it like a champ.
Why the "hell" is this here?
You say this to your friend, "Damn, your nuts are bigger than mine!" *thinks the wrong way*.
Friend: I must order more nuts.
My girlfriend's name is Candice.
Can these nuts fit in your mouth? :D
What's a fish without eyes?
A fsh.
Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.
Your forehead is so big Mega Mind gets jealous.
Are you a rope? Let's hang out by a tree and drink :)