Worst Jokes Ever

Mommy, mommy! Do we own a sweatshop?

Shut up and keep sewing!

Mommy, mommy! Are we outlaws? Your stepmom thinks so.

"Mommy, mommy! Are we janitors?"

"Shut up and pass me the mop."

Mommy, mommy! Are we bank robbers?

Shut up and pass me the note.

Mommy, Mommy! Are we werewolves?

Shut up and comb your face.

Mommy, Mommy! Are we vampires?

Shut up and drink your soup before it clots!

Why was the apple 🍎 sad?

Because he got his peelings hurt.

What do you call a surprised Chinese man?

Ho Lee Fuk.

"What's your name, son?" the principal asked his student. The kid replied, "D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir." "Do you have a stutter?" the principal asked. The student answered, "No sir, my dad has a stutter, but the guy who registered my name was a real jerk."

As I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe a career as a tour guide was not the right choice.

My roasts aren't funny. At least this shit gets me money.

My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf....ftysrrtfgbjysou34w45pjr578v

I think them homosexuals are rather gay.

What is Saturn's favorite song?

"7 Rings."

Why did the orphans have in common? They both don't have parents.

Your mom is so fat, it takes a year to turn around.

What is a pile of balls?

What are the four letters you don't want to hear from a dentist?

I C D K

When is the best time to go to the dentist?

2:30.

Parents: "I'm taking your toys to the orphanage." Kid: "Why?" Parents: "So you don't get bored there."