Worst Jokes Ever

What do a black and a tornado have in common?

They both wreck neighborhoods.

TJ's hairline so far back you still couldn't find it when the Devil was alive.

A boy's hairline is always in the back of his head, and its shape is like a check mark.

Stan says shut the f**k up or sit your ass down on that b***h chair!

I remember you. You used to be an ash.

I would love to roast you more, but my mom said to not burn trash.

I overdosed on Viagra yesterday.

It was the hardest day of my life.

Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.

Teach a feminist to fish and she will accuse you of patronising her, claim she knew how to do it anyway, and that even if she didn’t, she could easily work it out without the help of a man.

I went to a feminist picnic the other day.

It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches.

How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. They just hold it in the socket and expect the world to revolve around them.

Why did the feminist fail algebra?

She couldn’t solve inequalities.

What do you call a horde of Autistic kids?

A zombie Apocalypse!

Uuuuuuhhhhhhhhh🧟

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs?

Names.

Call me fat? You call me fat because you think that you’re pretty, but you ain’t. You’re just a musty, dusty, rusty Cardi B.

Roses are red, violets are blue, people think that you’re fat, until they saw your mom.

Why do kids prefer to spend more time with their dad than their mom?

They already know that their dad is gonna get "Milk" and never return.

I have been charged, because I roasted a kid at a barbeque.

Me testing if there is fall damage in real life (falls off of a cliff, uses water bucket trick) dies.

"We are Number one."

Stephen Hawking doesn’t have a dick; he has a microchip.

Being a police officer in Nunavut must be so fun. They get to play Cut the Rope on the job all the time!