I was walking in a park today and a little girl I asked, "Where are your parents?" She said, "Gone. My dad went to go get the milk and never came back," and I said, "Oof."
What’s the issue with 9/11 jokes?
They never land.
Just like the planes.
You will never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace.
Could never understand why people would say Stephen Hawking is a dead man walking.
You look at it. You tug on it like a shoe string. You play with it like elastic bubble plastic, but it still never grows.
Why was Stephen Hawking never trusted when taking a quiz?
"No computers allowed on the test!"
Huggy Wuggy and Kissy Missy had a baby.
They never gave him a name, so they just played cut the rope with him...
Why do people never kick their own balls?
Because they might lose one!
Drinking coffee when you're anxious is about as effective as using gasoline to put out a fire, but slurp slurp guess who's an anxious bitch who never learns.
What's a energy drink orphans never tried? "Mother".
Hi, are you even my sister?
Yes, I am.
No, you're not, because you never even existed as my sister.
Why do orphans suck at baseball? Because they never could play catch.
Why is the sand always pissed off?
Because the sand never waves back!
You wanna hear an Indian egg joke? (yeah-)
Never mind. You won't understand.
What goes up but never goes down?
My grades.
(I wish)
"Rajesh get on bus, so many people, squeeze here squeeze there. He daydream about naughty stuff, like coffee spill but not coffee. Bus move, stop, he press close to pretty lady, she smell nice. Rajesh think how funny if something else spill, make whole bus ride wild." He laugh to self, bus ride never boring now!
Dear Victims... äh Passengers, we are flying now from Ryadh to New York. Amazing Building... äh Amazing City. There's online, but 2000 there were two Towers... äh Restaurants. We hijack the plane... äh Hi Jack. Jack is my co-pilot, and I said hello. Don‘t scream... History Repea... äh... History never comes back, we are now flying back to the Airport. 💀
Hey can i tell you a joke about pencils never mind its pointless.
Why orphans so good at tennis Answer : because they never knew wat love was
A man walks into a bar, and says "Ouch!" And the women look at him as if they have never seen a man walk into a bar before.
