My friend’s mother was never a font of sympathy, but always the one to see beyond the darkness.
Upon learning about her daughter’s cancer diagnosis she said, “Well honey, at least you’ll lose some weight!”
I'll never forget my grandfather's last words: "STOP SHAKING THE LADDER, YOU LITTLE CUNT!"
Roses are not always red, Violets are violet, not blue. Irises are never red, Petunias can be kinda blue.
What does this tell us 'cept you can't trust a poet to tell the truth.
When you can’t see your adopted joke pop up, it’s the same as asking your adopted friend where their parents are and never finding it.
What is the difference between a baby and a canoe?
I would never put a canoe in my garage.
Why are orphans not boomerangs? Because they never come back.
The reason why people are short is because their dad never came back with the milk.
I never forget my grandpa's last words.
"Are you still holding the ladder?"
Roses are red, your eyes are brown; never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
But wait, what family? He never had one.
Guys, we need to stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents might get upset. Oh, wait... never mind.
I never do dark jokes, but when I feel like it, I prefer orphan jokes, 'cause they're the safest option. I mean, what are they gonna do, call their parents?
I was going to make a pun about math, but my answers never add up.
I broke up with my deaf girlfriend because she never listened to me.
Why can’t you kidnap an orphan?
Because you can’t steal what was never wanted in the first place.
A girl named Sally has no arms.
"KNOCK KNOCK"
She never answered...
Why does a woman never set boundaries with a Mexican? Cause they will always cross it.
What do you call a broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless!
Why do orphans hate knock knock jokes?
Because there is never anyone at the door.
Why do sharks never attack lawyers? -- Professional courtesy.
