Need jokes
Why do orphans never get a car?
Because their parents need to buy them one.
Me: What do we need from there? I have a few things to do before I head out to the store, and then I will be home to pick up the stuff.
Random person: What stuff? 🤨
Me: What?
The person: You said you’re going to pick up “the stuff”!!! What do you mean by that?!
Me: Colourful flamingo fart.
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture? You need only one nail to hang a picture, unfortunately.
I'm lonely, but all I have is my cheeseburger, but what is the matter of living if you only have one thing?
But a cheeseburger is all you need 'cause it has 1,000,000,000,000 bucks man, so I can't just take it and spend it wherever I want.
What does an autistic kid and a loaf of bread have in common?
They both have special needs.
roses are red coal needs to burn i masterbated and it started to burn
Who needs parents to be great?
I wanted to hire a butler for my new mansion in downtown LA. As he arrived, he introduced himself and I discovered it was Ghostionel Pessi.
I asked him why is he working as a butler? He told me that “a big game is coming up so he needs to refine his bottleling skills.” DAMN PESSI!
God needed an extra two hands to make your fat ass of a mother.
frshfry we need to talk now!
What goes up and down and needs two people?
A seesaw.
I'm just a prom night dumpster baby I got no mam or dad. Prom night dumpster baby My story isn't long, but boy, it's awfully sad. Although I came from a hole (Although I came from a hole) I'm singin' right from the soul (I'm singin' right from the soul)
My fanny needs a blanket And somebody to spank it I miss my mam But she's at the prom So I'm prom night dumpster baby Prom night dumpster baby
And I'm takin' a stroll (He's taking a stroll) I'm takin' a stroll (He's taking a stroll) I'm takin' a stroll (He's taking a stroll) Hahaha, I'm takin' a stroll (He's taking a stroll)
Q: Why do birds need feathers?
A: To cover up their butt quack!
Yo mama so fat when she goes to the shoe store, she needs to take their advice and get XXXXL.
Man 1: Dude, Viagra is for pussies. Real men don’t need Viagra.
Man 2: I thought Viagra was for dicks?
Yo mama so fat, when she falls, they have to call 999 and a crane to pick her up.
My mom was cooking dinner and asked me if I could get her a cutting board.
"No, I need you to take off your shirt and lay on the island so I can cut some chicken."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
Little old lady, you don't need to yodel about it. Yodel who? Yodel who?
Yo mama so fat, she needs 17 iPhones to take a selfie.
Yo mama so fat, she needs two watches for each timezone.
You’ll need a bib when you’re done eating my ribs.