My jokes
A kid calls out for his mom one day while he is in the tub and says, "Mom come quick! I'm walking on water!"
And the mom runs in and says, "I knew evon whatent yo daddy! I ain't never slept with him a day my life!"
I asked this kid for a high five, but he could not reach my hand.
"Can I throw you away? You look like my trash can. Oh, wait, you *are* my trash can."
I was bullying a little kid for having a purple eye and said, "Where'd you get that? Your mom? Your dad?"
After that, everyone in my group was laughing at the kid. The next day I never saw him again.
Bully: My d*ck is longer than your password. Me: I don't have a password. So you *won't* have a d*ck after I tear it off you.
The police: Pull over!
The kid: Do you know who my dad is?
The police: What, your mom did not tell you?
Once in 4th grade, right now, I told a random tree, "Hey, my day is bad right now, can we hang later?"
The tree said: "Yeah, we are going to be hanging every day :) !!! If you can last :)"
My sister is so dumb, she genuinely spent lockdown studying for a COVID test.
My hair is blue, and I'm blue!
I took out my mother-in-law, being a sniper, I'd fun.
My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets!"
My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets."
Check out my new song. It’s called “Nlggas in the hood,” and it’s really good, so go listen.
Her: Eat my ass!
Me: Yes, chef!
My fat friend went to the doctor because he wanted to know his blood type. After performing some tests, the doctor said, "Well, the test results have shown that your blood type is ragu."
I was driving a car and a fat person was crossing the street. When I swerved my car to miss her, I ran out of gas.
Your hairline had to "Fahrt" cuz my ass IS your hairline.
Meant to say my friend's nan, not man.
Errrrrrrrrr my spine doesn't work.
Eeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
Yo mama is so ugly, when I took a picture of her, my phone screen cracked.